OK so maybe it's not that bad. Today I had this episode of disciplining Miss S and I walked into the kitchen to find Denielle looking at me like "Seriously? Again?" She was right. I was wrong. And I knew it. I felt like Tommy Boy sitting in the cafe with Richard talking about how he handles the negotiations for deals. He starts out loving it and giving it all kinds of good attention. Then, inevitably, he messes it up and destroys any chance at making the sale.
I just can't figure it out. I'm trying to get a handle on it. Trying to understand her 7 year old mind. Trying to teach her without destroying her spirit. Trying to have a conversation without her ending up crying and me ending up frustrated.
She did something today where she either got embarassed and then lied about something to make me look bad instead of her or she just disobeyed. I think it's the former but she said it was both. Understand my frustration yet? It's just tough. Sometimes she acts like an 18year old who's ready to be totally independent. Other times she acts like a 4 year old who just needs to be held a little bit. I have no problem with either one. It would just be really nice if there was a sign over her head that illuminated whenever her age "changed."
She's such a sweet girl sometimes. I told her that when I took her out of timeout today. I picked her up and just talked to her about how much I love her and care about her. I told her I didn't like punishing her but that I had to. I told her she has to follow the rules or she'll just end up there again. I tried to emphasize the positives. I kept rubbing her back and telling her that I love her. At the very least, it got her out of her funk. She came back out and we had a really nice dinner together and ended up with a good night. Let's hope I can go from "suck" to "not terrible" tomorrow...
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